Saturday, December 20, 2008
You have GOT to be kidding me!?! This note is what I woke up to this morning- a lovely little note from Boys' roommate- taped to the front door handle along with the "dish" that I did not wash. The dish was a 2x2 Tupperware dish that I was eating m&ms out of. (If it can be held up by tape----it's not a dish).
(If you can't read it- it says, "Little sack, Why do none of your dishes make it into the dishwasher? If you want to be up at this house you need to clean up after yourself!")
Boy's roommate is without a doubt the BIGGEST passive aggressive A**HOLE I have ever encountered. This note, was the straw that broke the camel's back. Because I am so ragingly pissed right now, I will tell you the series of bullsh*t things that Boy's roommate (we will call him Jerk) has put me through.
Jerk had his girlfriend living at the house for over a year before she paid for a single bill, utility, or otherwise and was there every day when Jerk wasn't (after a year of living there for free, she now pays bills)
My college roommate's boyfriend basically lived at my house and was very messy. and I HATED it. He was there more than i was there- slept every night there, etc. So, when I moved home, I vowed that I would not be "that girlfriend" and I would not be at Boy's house too much. I have kept that promise to myself very well, and am rarely there more than two nights a week.
I also make sure that all of my things are only ever in Boy's room and not in common areas, and that shared dishes (pot's, plates, etc) are washed immediately after use.
Instances of Jerk throwing straws at camels back:
1. Instance 1- Boy and I had been dating for about 2 years when I graduated, moved out of my college townhouse and moved back home. Up until that point Boy and I split time between hanging out at each other's places, but were never together for more than 2-3 nights per week. When I moved home, I would often go over Boy's after work on Friday and because of differing schedules, I would be at Boy's house before Boy got home. Instead of relying on Boy's roommates to be home- Boy made me a key. Fine.
One week day I had to stopped by Boy's house to pick up something I left there. Not expecting anyone to be home, I was frightened when Jerk was home and asked me what I was doing there.
LS: Uh, picking something up
Jerk: How'd you get in?
LS: I have a key
Jerk: How'd you get a key?
LS: Boy made me one.
Jerk: OH?! (Turn on heel and walk away)
So, being pretty intuitive I realized Jerk was not happy, quickly left the house, told Boy about it and began to walk to walk on egg shells, feeling very unwelcome.
2. Instance Two: Jerk is VERY particular about a clean house, which is fine. I like things tidy too. I can appreciate that. Over the 2 years Boy and I have been dating, he has yelled (yes, yelled and scolded) at Boy to clean up his dishes. Knowing how particular Jerk is about this--I always make sure that immediately after we finish eating dinner--the dishes are washed.
3. Instance three: Boy generally works on Saturday morning, so he leaves his house before I get up. Last weekend I got up to leave and a cup and a "dish" (again a small Tupperware I was eating baked cheetos out of) were sitting on the stairway, as a clear sign to me to put them the hell away. Because Jerk was in the kitchen and I wanted to avoid him, I stepped over the dishes and left the house. I wasn't giving into his passive aggressive bull shit.
4. Instance four: This morning I am leaving the house (again after Boy has gone to work) and find this LOVELY little note taped to the door knob. Just last night Boy told me I was "reading too much into Jerk's action." I was Freikin livid when I saw this note! Like, beyond a normal level of anger and pissed off-ness. First, I always ensure that out dinner dishes are done and I'm sorry that I left a cup out on the coffee table, because I forgot to put it away before bed. But I really don't understand why this is such a big deal. And, if it is such a big deal---all Jerk has to say is, "Hey, Littlesack, i'd appreciate it if youd put your cups in the dishwasher before going to bed." LIKE A GROWN UP!
So, I call Boy to tell him that I am certainly not overreacting, because well, Jerk left me this lovely little letter. (My favorite part of the letter is the "if you want to be here" like he is threatening from barring me from Boy's home like I'm a five year old child).
So, Boy promises me he will talk to Jerk about it.
And this is also the last straw for Boy too (who has way more patience than I have ever possessed). Apparently, Boy told me this this morning, but a few months ago, Jerk told Boy that since I was there more, I should have to pay utilities. Boy didn't feel like arguing, so he agreed. (don't get me started on why he agreed.) So, for the past few months the utilities have been split five ways (Jerk, jerk's GF, other roommate, Boy, and me) and Boy has been paying 2 shares. HONESTLY---WTF?!?!!?! I have, over the entire course of our more than 2 year relationship taken less than 10 showers there. I am also only there when Boy isn't for less than an hour most Friday nights. There is no way I am using enough utilities to warrant Boy paying two shares. And, I'm upset that Boy was paying that money and didn't tell me.
I have lost it! I am a 22 year old woman! I, nor my 24 year old boyfriend, do not deserve to be treated like we are children. I am at my wit's end and honestly have no idea what to do about it. Boy is going to talk to Jerk, but, I certainly don't want to go there anymore. But--where am I going to go? Living at home isn't awful, but I'm only doing it to save money while going to grad school. I have no place of my own, and If I can't go to Boy's, where will I go when I need downtime?
UGH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I have no more to say, I am sorry that this is long and ugly, but I needed to get it off my chest because crying about it wasn't helping.