Time again for Not Me! Monday.

In case you haven't been introduced to Not Me! Monday, yet, here are a few details. This fun game originated with MckMama. Here are the rules to playing, but in sum, you just list a lot of things you "didn't" (read: actually did) do this weekend/past week. All in the name of admitting that we all make mistakes and aren't perfect.

Saturday, during my long run, I certainly did not, stop running, duck behind a cluster of trees, and use the bathroom (#2 bathroom!!). This was not right next to some kids' blunt wraps and empty beer cans. It was not a complete emergency and waiting until the trail stop was totally not possible!!

Okay...That's all for the week. Although there are certainly more, nothing!! lives up to having to make an emergency pit stop in the woods during a two hour run. (I once read an article about runners embarrassing moments, and one of them said - if you've never taken a poop on a run, you aren't a real runner, well---guess I passed that threshold!)

What didn't you do this past week?

Not Me! Monday

It's been a looooonnnnngggg time since I did a "Not Me! Monday" and believe me, I have a lot saved up.

In case you haven't been introduced to Not Me! Monday, yet, here are a few details. This fun game originated with MckMama. Here are the rules to playing, but in sum, you just list a lot of things you "didn't" (read: actually did) do this weekend/past week. All in the name of admitting that we all make mistakes and aren't perfect.

So, here we go....

I clearly did not have a colossal freak out at work on what happened to be Douch Bag Wednesday (less formerly known as DB-dub) when the following happened... First, my boss hung up his phone in the middle of a teleconference simply because he did not want to hear what we were telling him. An hour later, he called me to tell me that our consultant emailed him to state that "my work was subpar and I was compromising the project." My response was that the consultant could take over the task himself, since clearly he did not like the way I was doing it. My boss did not tell me that I was being unprofessional. You want to talk about unprofessionalim?!?!?!?!!?! How about that meeting you just hung up on or the way you nasty-gramed me this morning. Neither of which are "professional." It did not take every fiber of my being for me to not tell my boss to shove his hippocratic, self-entitled, douchebag ways.

I didnot soothe myself with hershey kisses and chocolate covered raisins. I would never ever use chocolate to make myself feel better.

Over the past month or so, I have certainly not peed outside on more than half a dozen occasions. It has certainly not become common for me to stop mid run, hide behind a tree, drop trough, and continue jogging like that was totally normal.

I did not give my cat a bath. I do not have multiple scratches from this experience. I do not blame my mother.

I did not take a mental health day and then a mental health morning from work. Getting out of bed to get to that job is not becoming more difficult by the day.

I am not typing this post while sitting in my undies & sipping a glass a wine. I am not relishing having the house 100% to myself (besides my cat).

I did not spend 40 dollars on an alpaca fur teddy bear. It was not totally self indulgent but totally worth it. (I certainly couldn't have used that money for some new work pants that actually fit me).

I have not shopped at Target at least twice a week for the last month. I certainly do not know why I keep going back- except that a store that sells 20 dollar shoes and bags of hershey kisses in the same place totally gets me.

I did not wear a white dress to a Mother-to-be-Tea thinking it would be an excellent idea. I did not spill tea all over it.

Boy and I did not have the best time with Caleb at the zoo! I did not totally enjoy playing family for the day. And did not seriously consider taking him home with us.(a pic of Boy and Caleb feeding the ducks--except I didn't get any ducks in the picture--ill have to work on that!)

I have not totally and completely missed blogging and all of my blog ladies. and I do not promise to catch up on everything soon.

Something to giggle about...

Because even in the midst of some really bad days, everyone needs something to laugh about. Last week, a woman I work with sent out this gem of an e-mail.

"Hi everyone:

I lost a medela breast pump in the office last Friday, most likely in the Suite 310 kitchen. If you happen to see it, can you let me know

Thanks in advance"

The boys that sit next to me thought this was too-die-for funny. We all laughed about it for hours afterward. No, breast pumps aren't funny, but asking the ENTIRE company if anyone had found your breast pump that you left IN THE KITCHEN, is pretty funny.

And, how do you loose a breast pump? Aren't those things back-packed sized? Maybe we are all a little immature, but this made my day last week.

**On another note, thank you all so very, very much for your kind thoughts, prayers and words in these last few weeks. I was very hesitant at first to share this part of my life and considered abandoning the blog, but I'm glad I didn't. In a very needy time, you all were there like rocks--offering advice and unconditional love (and to a girl whose first name you don't even know). So, thank you all, so much; you are all strong lovely ladies and I am so grateful that I have been able to develop friendships with you all. I promise my blog will get back to its normal, snarky and self-indulgent ways soon.

Happy weekend.

Love, littlesack

Caleb

So, left in wake of Eric...is his three year old son, Caleb.

(an older picture of the little Ham)

An adorable, playful kid that has the most gorgeous eyelashes I've ever seen and an infectious personality.

His mother is one of the craziest people I have ever met in my life, and on numerous occassions has corned me in bathrooms to seek answers out about Boy, Eric, and family, and how things are when Eric has(had?) Caleb. (Eric and the mother weren't together after awhile)

She was very young when she got involved with Eric and very young to be a mother, and I just don't think she had the time to mature into a woman with adult sensibilities before Caleb came along and she hasn't grown up since. But, she is his mother, so I am just praying that she figures it out sooner, rather than later. I think I've written about it before, that if Boy and I were financially stable we would seriously consider adopting Caleb, but...that just won't work at the moment.

Boy is Caleb's godfather and although Boy isn't very religious, I know he takes this role--of raising Caleb with morals and values, very seriously. I also know that he is heartbroken that Eric won't be around to do the "dad" things--- camping trips, Boy Scouts, teaching him to play lacrosse, etc. Boy plans to do these things with Caleb.

We currently live about an hour from Boy's parents and Caleb. We've been house hunting for the past few months, but our area is so wide (and our budget so low) that it's really frustrating. I graduate from my program in December and hopefully I'll be able to find a full-time job. Once we know where I am going to be working, I think we will resume the house hunt. But now, a major priority for us is to move closer to Caleb. Even a half an hour closer would make things a lot easier. But--I don't know. It's difficult to talk these details with Boy and, well, it's just difficult.

We are going back to visit Caleb this weekend. It will be the first time we've seen him since his mother told Caleb about Eric (speaking of...she told Boy the day before that they were telling Caleb last Saturday, and he had to work. It pisses me off that if she really wanted Boy to be there---she should have given him more than one days notice). I think it's going to be horrible. but...it leads me to my current predicament. I don't know what to do to entertain a three-year-old. I'm not a mother and, well, honestly, I just have no idea what is age-appropriate yet fun? Any help? I know a lot of you are mothers and aunts, and any suggestions about how to spend the day with a three-year-old would be really appreciated.

Thanks, ladies.

Prayers needed

I've been MIA, I know. I'm sorry.

I hope to catch up on everyone's lives soon.

Boy's brother died two Fridays ago (7/17) unexpectedly at the age of 27.
His three year old son is left behind.
I meant to write about it two weeks ago, but I couldn't get the words down. Each post started and ended with "Boy's brother died." I couldn't get past that. Seeing it in print was even worse.

Everyone is doing as well as can be expected. Boy is a tough cookie, and although the viewing and funeral were the roughest moments of his life, I know he is glad that he stood in front of his friends and family and gave a heartbreaking eulogy.

The trauma of the moment has passed, but it will always linger for Boy and his family. I think it will be hardest for Boy when, it isn't Eric as his best man, but...it's someone else.

I hope to be back sooner, rather than later, but in the meantime, please send a prayer or two out for Boy, his family, and especially Caleb, Eric's son.

I hope everything in all of your fabulous lives is going really well. Send some happy gossip my way.

I feel violated...

Thanks for all your questions, I'm working on the answers now.
But, in the meantime, I need to share this story.

Friday night, Boy and I were at a friend's (Remy) house for a bbq with about 15 people. A place we have been dozens of times, camping, partying, etc. Everyone there was either related to Remy, or Boy's other friend, Nate. Boy and I consider about 95% of the people there to be good friends.

The bbq was also in a section of our state, where people have lots of land and there is no crime. Remy keeps his keys in his unlocked car at night. The nearest neighbor is more than half a mile away.

Midway through the evening, I threw my purse in Boy's car because I didn't want to accidentally forget it and then Boy and I walked back to the bonfire, leaving the car unlocked.**

An hour or so later, Boy and I get up to leave, get in the car, and my purse is gone. Just 100% completely missing. I was not drinking at all this night because I had a 11 mile run planned on Saturday, so it wasn't my foggy brain misplacing my bag. Without a doubt, someone had took it.
As rationally as possible, Boy and I talked to Remy and said, look, someone went into Boy's car and took my bag, and while we aren't accusing anyone of taking it--someone took it. It's that simple.

Yes, there is a 1% chance that a random stranger walked down this random road and walked down Remy's 1/2 mile long driveway and randomly spotted Boy's car, and randomly took my purse. Yes, it's possible, yet highly unlikely.

So---how do I go about processing this information? I am 99% sure that someone at that bbq took my bag. These are all people that we see on a regular basis and, in fact, have plans to go camping with them in two weeks. How am I supposed to get over it...knowing that someone we consider to be a friend, went into Boy's car and purposefully took my bag? Now, there were 3 people there that Brent and I don't consider friends, but they are family of Remy's or family of Nate's. So, even if this person wasn't our friend directly, we've still hung out with them before, and shouldn't they have enough respect for their own family not to put all of us in this situation.

and...it is a situation.. Congratulations-- you got 60 dollars in cash; my birth control packet; all my cards- insurance, library, gym, license, credit (which i cancelled); my 20 dollar sigg water bottle; my overly expensive prescription contact eye drops; my keys; my work keys; my shitty ass 4 year old phone, and a bunch of other random stuff that isn't that important, but that I miss. Oh, and also, you took my sense of security.

But--in taking all those things, you created a horrible situation. Now, Boy and I are super wary of these friends, and who they hang out with. And although we practically know that someone there took it, we had to ask all of our friends if they had "accidentally" picked up my bag. We accused our friends of stealing, because, well- someone did. Nate and Remy are both upset with Boy because we were asking their family members about it. (and I would be pissed too, if we were in there shoes, but I hope they understand how we feel- utterly violated and betrayed). I feel so tormented inside, its unreal. I can't even stop thinking about. It would have been better had it happened at a bar and my a random stranger. But now, we all have to deal with the aftermath of it. That, someone I KNOW STOLE FROM ME. Every spare second, I think about, running it over in my head- how could someone possibly do that?

I hope the shit you got outta my purse was worth it. I really do.



**In hindsight, I know this sounds so awful, but of the many times we have been at Remy's we have never locked our car. It's just not something you worry about there.

100th Post Q and A

*Ahem*
Pardon the interruption, but this post (yes this one right here) is my 100th post! Who new that since I started on this journey in November, I'd have 100 things to say. Granted a few of them were pretty lame (like the one about how my cat had a girlfriend). Some of them were fairly dramatic, like when Boy's jerk roomate left me a passive aggressive note.* And, of course, there is the series of free weekly therapy with Not Me! Mondays.

Over the course of these past few months, I have met some great bloggy friends and really enjoyed getting to know snid-bits of everyone's life. And, of course, I've shared some details of my life with the blog-o-sphere as well. But, perhaps there is more you want to know (or, you may want to say- "Littlesack, you and your blog are lame...and I don't want to know anything else about you"). But, if its the former, and you have some questions, I'd love to provide some answers. (Mostly) anything is free game.

I'm looking forward to reading your questions!






*HUGE news on this front, remind me to tell you later!!