Not Me! Monday

It's been a looooonnnnngggg time since I did a "Not Me! Monday" and believe me, I have a lot saved up.

In case you haven't been introduced to Not Me! Monday, yet, here are a few details. This fun game originated with MckMama. Here are the rules to playing, but in sum, you just list a lot of things you "didn't" (read: actually did) do this weekend/past week. All in the name of admitting that we all make mistakes and aren't perfect.

So, here we go....

I clearly did not have a colossal freak out at work on what happened to be Douch Bag Wednesday (less formerly known as DB-dub) when the following happened... First, my boss hung up his phone in the middle of a teleconference simply because he did not want to hear what we were telling him. An hour later, he called me to tell me that our consultant emailed him to state that "my work was subpar and I was compromising the project." My response was that the consultant could take over the task himself, since clearly he did not like the way I was doing it. My boss did not tell me that I was being unprofessional. You want to talk about unprofessionalim?!?!?!?!!?! How about that meeting you just hung up on or the way you nasty-gramed me this morning. Neither of which are "professional." It did not take every fiber of my being for me to not tell my boss to shove his hippocratic, self-entitled, douchebag ways.

I didnot soothe myself with hershey kisses and chocolate covered raisins. I would never ever use chocolate to make myself feel better.

Over the past month or so, I have certainly not peed outside on more than half a dozen occasions. It has certainly not become common for me to stop mid run, hide behind a tree, drop trough, and continue jogging like that was totally normal.

I did not give my cat a bath. I do not have multiple scratches from this experience. I do not blame my mother.

I did not take a mental health day and then a mental health morning from work. Getting out of bed to get to that job is not becoming more difficult by the day.

I am not typing this post while sitting in my undies & sipping a glass a wine. I am not relishing having the house 100% to myself (besides my cat).

I did not spend 40 dollars on an alpaca fur teddy bear. It was not totally self indulgent but totally worth it. (I certainly couldn't have used that money for some new work pants that actually fit me).

I have not shopped at Target at least twice a week for the last month. I certainly do not know why I keep going back- except that a store that sells 20 dollar shoes and bags of hershey kisses in the same place totally gets me.

I did not wear a white dress to a Mother-to-be-Tea thinking it would be an excellent idea. I did not spill tea all over it.

Boy and I did not have the best time with Caleb at the zoo! I did not totally enjoy playing family for the day. And did not seriously consider taking him home with us.(a pic of Boy and Caleb feeding the ducks--except I didn't get any ducks in the picture--ill have to work on that!)

I have not totally and completely missed blogging and all of my blog ladies. and I do not promise to catch up on everything soon.